It’s the second you’ve all been ready for*: my first ever e-book, How Not To Be A Supermodel, is accessible for pre-order! Right here!
An precise e-book that it is possible for you to to carry in your fingers. Or, for those who choose my dulcet tones, take heed to along with your ears. You’ve cherished my revealing life updates, through the years, and also you’ve diligently learn by means of my farcical tales of woe (keep in mind once I nearly unintentionally penetrated myself with a shower faucet?): now it’s time to let me take you all the way in which again to 2001, once I was a mere slip of a factor, leaving my legislation diploma to turn into an immediately wealthy and well-known supermodel.
You possibly can name How Not To Be A Supermodel a memoir, as a result of I wrote it about myself and my reminiscences and the experiences I had as a vogue mannequin within the noughties, however my God that makes it sound very severe. “Memoir” makes it sound as if I wrote my e-book within the 1800s. Within the drawing room, while mom did her needlepoint and Eliza practised on the pianoforte.
And let me ask you this: would a memoir, to your thoughts, embody a narrative about unintentionally occurring a luxurious five-day vacation with a person you didn’t know? Would a memoir usually have a chapter referred to as Physique Like a Turgid Penis? Or – maintain on a second whereas I rustle by means of my notes – I’m Drunk and I’m Not Carrying Knickers? No it will not.
So sure, I wrote it about me and sure, it’s set up to now, however don’t make the error of considering that any painful soul-searching went into this e-book. Let’s not get the unsuitable finish of the stick, right here. I didn’t write it while sobbing periodically right into a starched linen kerchief, dabbing my eyes when it acquired to the insufferable bits: it is a rip-roaring riot of a experience by means of a decade of the unbelievable eventualities and surprising occasions that life as a non-supermodel threw up, and it’s chaotic and blundering and humorous and often ridiculous.
Pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel
OK, there are poignant moments. After all there are. In truth I used to be particularly advised, once I acquired the e-book deal, that I needed to embody the bits that may create one thing of a speaking level. (As if me inadvertently turning into concerned in an impromptu intercourse present or nearly falling into shark-infested waters wasn’t sufficient of a speaking level.) And so sure, I’ve put within the troublesome bits in addition to the entire elements that can probably have you ever spitting out your espresso and embarrassing your self on public transport.
However largely it is a snort-inducing, extremely correct** account of all of the methods wherein I didn’t turn into a supermodel. My obvious bodily shortcomings, my persona defects and my spectacular skill to draw chaos and catastrophe in nearly any scenario.
You possibly can pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel now – the discharge date is twenty ninth August. It has already been heralded as THE ONLY BOOK YOU NEED TO READ THIS YEAR!*** and so I believe it’s a reasonably secure guess that you simply’ll like it. Pre-orders actually matter, apparently, and so for those who solely ever click on on one hyperlink I put up then please make it this one. I’ll be endlessly in your debt.
Pre-order your copy of How Not To Be A Supermodel right here
I’ll be again with extra posts concerning the e-book and concerning the strategy of writing it as a result of it has actually been the most effective, most satisfying factor I’ve ever achieved in my grownup life. For those who’ve adopted me for some time you then’ll know that writing was what I had began to do on the finish of my modelling profession; running a blog was a really blissful accident that took off into one thing nice and I’ve a superb and rewarding profession in social media due to it, however I’ve been hounding a e-book deal for a really very long time****. It’s a correct “full circle” second for me.
*with a bit of luck
**as correct as doable. Principally correct. Considerably correct.
***I used to be pressured to supply this quote myself, as a result of it’s too early to get one off one other author but. I attempted to maintain it delicate and stylish.
****actually, the variety of individuals I needed to sleep with.
